An Important life Lesson – Allow Him to Change

While riding in the car with my husband, he mentioned that he was playing golf with a person with whom there was some issues when he joined our club. Apparently, individuals who knew him from his previous club stated said he was asked to leave due to his inability to get along with others. When he first joined our club there were some perceptions that things had not changed much. When Don said he was playing with his I asked how he felt about it and he replied that he was okay. When I questioned if he was different, Don said, “When he first joined, he had a chip on his shoulder, but he’s okay now. “What do you think caused the change?” Don replied, “I had to allow him to change!”

Wow, I thought … Allow him to change… how often do we pigeonhole someone and not allow them to change? As an Employee Assistant Professional in a former career often people would try to overcome personal issues only to have others constantly reminding them of how he or she used to be. “Remember when you” … was a constant source of irritation to an individual who was trying to improve their track record. It is really important to help them to change by reinforcing their efforts. Positive feedback is important and can give them a greater commitment toward the goal they are trying to achieve. Help them know how far he or she has come. Accept that people are not perfect and will make mistakes, and that is a perfect opportunity to have candid feedback and listen to understand the person. Help them in getting back on track and then reinforce when you see the slightest changes. You will both be better for the opportunity to support one another.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

What people are saying.
Beth Sears provided her time and expertise to assist us in resolving a difficult and emotionally charged situation regarding our next work season in Africa … Beth was able first to empower us to honor the fact that there was major conflict in our thinking and helped us define a process to deal with the differing opinions. … In our final meeting, it was amazing to see the most entrenched and angry member of the group changed their demeanor. We came to a fine resolution and are a stronger body because of the experience. Beth deserves much credit for guiding and encouraging us and giving us the tools to meet our challenges. I recommend her work without hesitation.
Nancy Joiner Reinert | Chair, Communications Committee | Water for Sudan (Now Water for South Sudan)
Read More

Download Beth's eBook

4 Communication Keys of High Performing Organizations for New or Seasoned Leaders

Whether new to the position or having done it for a while, a leadership role takes a shift in perspective and skills to create followers. Through communication, this book will outline foundational skills to align your people with your vision by creating an engaged high-trust team. This expertise will reduce turnover and help to create a sustainable, profitable organization.
Get the eBook!
Let’s work together
Find out how Beth can help you and your organization achieve extraordinary results.
Contact Beth
Our latest blog posts
See All Posts
Stay connected to Beth for High Impact Results.